Chances are your kids are already using lots of media. And chances are you haven’t yet found time to explicitly outline your online expectations of what they are and aren’t allowed to do, in writing.
When we got our child her first smartphone, we wrote and signed the following family media agreement. Our goal was to create a flexible agreement that didn’t get bogged down in the details, and I think we did a pretty good job. Feel free to copy and paste it into an agreement of your own and customize it for your kids.
We were most concerned about computer and smartphone use, but it could easily be tweaked to encompass television and video game usage too.
I am never allowed to give out personal information (phone number, home address, or school name) or make plans to meet anyone I do not know in the real world.
I will unfriend, block, and/or stop talking to anyone who makes me feel pressured or uncomfortable. I will tell my parents if someone is persistently bothering me.
I will never use my phone while riding my bike, crossing the street, or walking through a parking lot.
I will be respectful to myself and others, even people I don’t like. I won’t be cruel online and I won’t tolerate, “like”, or otherwise encourage cruelty in others.
I will be a good online friend. I will respect other people’s privacy and feelings when posting photos or other content about them.
I will tell my parents immediately if anyone I know seems to be in trouble or in need of help, even people I don’t know well or like.
I understand that the photos and videos I post, and everything I write about myself and other people online can be saved and shared without my knowledge. Therefore, I will not post anything online that I wouldn’t want my family, teachers, college admissions officers, or future employers to see.
I will protect my passwords so people cannot pose and post as me. I will never pose as or post as anyone else.
I’ll be careful not to spend too much time online. I won’t let it interfere with sleep, schoolwork, hobbies, and my offline relationships with my friends and family.
I will not use my phone or computer recreationally after 9pm at night. I understand that if I cannot respect this rule, my parents will hold my devices overnight.
In social situations, I will make conversation and pay attention, even when I am uncomfortable. I understand that it is rude to look at my devices when others are talking, especially family friends, grandparents, teachers, coaches and employers.
I understand that my computer and phone belong to my parents, who trust my judgment and respect my privacy. However, if they are ever worried about my safety, I promise to answer their questions calmly and honestly. I understand that this family media agreement is subject to revision at my parents’ discretion.